Joes, slapps some gills on them, webbs thier feet, packages them in seaweed" It seems that all you've learned is that Caesar is a salad dressing dude. You see us as you want to see us: in the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. You know how you said your parents use you to get back at each other? That's l-i-n-C-o-l-n." Captain Logan: "I know how to spell Lincoln!! We can't possibly fight."Be excellent to each other-and-party on,dudes! What would you be doing if you weren't out making yourself a better citizen? Vernon: We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it is we did wrong, but we think you're crazy for making us write an essay telling you who we think we are. and i had to wear my dads shoes, which is funny casue my mom doesnt like me to wear other peoples shoes, and my cousin kendel from indiana, he got high once, and he started eating really werid foods, and then he felt like he didnt belong anywhere, kinda like the twilight zone, kinda... either sex, however, may bring a little gift, its value to be determined by the bizarrness of the sexual request to be made later that evening. All I have to do is read the paper: I'm marrying Richard Gere, dating Daniel Day-Lewis, parading around with John F. - Stockard Channing Fidelity to the subject's thoug Any idiot would know women's needs are simple.
He later said that he was so little known then that "at the time I quit, I was the only one who knew I quit!He suffered from lifelong bouts with depression."I tell you, I don't get no respect. She told me she liked me like a friend." "When I was born, the doctor said to my father, "I'm sorry, we did everything we could but he still pulled through." Although he didn't address Judaism directly in his jokes, his comic style falls well within the classic mold of Jewish humor--self-deprecating, neurotic, what Rabbi Joseph Telushkin, author of "Jewish Humor: What the Best Jewish Jokes Say About the Jews," calls the "distressed optimist." If there is one hallmark of Jewish humor, says Rabbi Telushkin, it is the absurd ability to keep us "laughing in order not to cry." In the classic film comedy "Caddyshack," Dangerfield portrayed Al, a boorish nouveau-riche Jew trying to buy a Wasp country club.About to enter the club with an Asian friend, Al says: "I hear this place is restricted, Wang, so don't tell 'em you're Jewish, OK?Besides the stainless steel construction makes the flux dispersal..... "Lorraine's Mom: "He's a very strange young man." Lorraine's Dad: "He's an idiot..comes from upbringing. Lorraine, you ever have a kid that acts like that, I'll disown you."Marty: "What the hell is a gigawatt?!! " " You see, the problem here is that my little brother this morning, got his arm caught in the microwave and uh my grandmother dropped acid and she freaked out and hi-jacked a school bus full of penguins so you see it's kind of a family crisis so..back later? ""My brother can make a rocket out of a blender and a vacuum and I can't get my car out of the driveway"Blaine, I've been going to this high school for seven and a half years. I've seen the Exorcist 67 times and it keeps getting funnier every single time I see it.